Yesterday was a Hallmark movie kind of day for me and I sat down to watch “Naughty or Nice”. It’s a movie about a girl who finds the Naughty or Nice Book that Santa Claus uses each year for his list.

What she finds out, though, is there is another side of the book, once flipped over, that is the Nice or Naughty book. There are two sides to every story she discovers. At one point in the movie she even states that no one is perfect and we all do both nice and naughty things. What determines what side of the book we’re on is which one, nice or naughty, do we do more of in our lives?

Hallmark, I’m sure, did not make this movie in the hopes to spiritualize things. So, I’m here to help you out! If we as a society are telling our children that if they mess up one time they will be on the naughty list, and we negate every other good thing they’ve done for the rest of the year, we are selling perfectionistic traits that are impossible for anyone.

We are setting our children up for failure. It’s defeating and I know this from personal experience. I usually messed up on Christmas afternoon or the day after and wondered when Santa started keeping score and if I’d already ruined my chance to be on the Nice List. Perhaps, if I can do enough good things, I wondered, would Santa let the one naughty thing I did slide?

My relationship with Santa became a works-based relationship. This, of course, carried into other areas of my life. Would my teacher at school be okay with me when I got a bad grade if all my others were good? What about my parents? I disappointed them when I didn’t listen the first time. What did I need to do for them to fully love me again? Then, there’s God! I mess up way too often to be able to do enough good to outweigh the bad.

This is why we MUST rethink how we view our holidays and our lives.

1. Perfection is NOT an option. Take a deep breath already and chill. Relax. That’s it: free yourself from perfectionism’s hold and know it’s not an option and not possible. Your holidays aren’t going to be perfect and your life is not either. If you continue to accept perfectionism’s challenge, you are making yourself an idol. Walk away. The bomb of perfection will explode in 5 seconds!
2. Accept your choice responsibilities. When we accept the fact that we will be both nice and naughty, we realize each decision is a choice. We are making that choice and no one else.  Accept that responsibility. Stop blaming your parents or your friends from high school. They might have given you the push to make bad decisions, but you ultimately made that decision yourself. Forgive others for the blame you’ve put on them for years and let it go. Forgive yourself, too, in the process.
3. Let go of the naughty list. We will remember both the nice and naughty about ourselves and others. Choose to focus on the nice list. See the good in others. This is how God sees us when we confess our sins to Him and ask for forgiveness. Shouldn’t we choose to see others like God seems them? Shouldn’t we choose to see ourselves like God sees us?

Here is your mission, should you choose to accept it: Know you are not perfect and let go of that false reality, accept responsibility for your naughty list and ask for forgiveness, and choose to see others’ nice list over their naughty list.

The bomb of perfectionism is about to explode. Go and be perfect no more!

© 2015 Susan M. Sims

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